After Margaret Maxey Ellis confessed her affair to her husband, the long journey of rebuilding trust began. His innocence helped her to keep the focus on him, caring for him as he worked through the betrayal. In the process, Margaret came to know God and His grace, which changed her. She began to have a heart for women who, like her, had been unfaithful in their marriage. God’s grace is greater than sin, and she now extends that hope to others.

Margaret Maxey Ellis grew up believing that if she was a good girl, obeying all the rules and ticking off the right boxes, she would be safe. She would be righteous and acceptable to God and others. Then life hit, and challenges in her marriage created a vulnerability that opened the door to an affair. Shame followed, as did God’s mercy and grace.

Author and ministry leader, Michelle Thooft, knew she needed to be free of the lies of shame and self-hatred that had caused so much damage in her physical health as well as her relationships. She needed to have a change of mindset instead of leaning over the cliff of regret and grief. She began a practice of taking every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5). As a result, healthy living took over where shame once dwelled.

Without full awareness, author Michelle Thooft carried self-hatred for her past wrongs. Her high capacity and spiritual influence masked the emotional turmoil that eventually damaged her body. When she became significantly ill, it was time to face the messages she told herself. Healing prayer created the first steps of healing.

Jason Castleberry could have remained in the pain of shame, PTSD, and regret after his military service, but God pursued him and saved him. Knowing Jesus changed everything. He went from living in isolation without purpose or joy, to experiencing fulfillment and freedom. His heart to share with others what God can do led him to become a pastor, shepherding people to know the God who healed him.

Jason Castleberry served in the military as a UAV (Drone) operator, and experienced the hell of war. Witnessing the destruction of lives and living under the pressure to perform affected him deeply. It would have been traumatic for anyone. He came home with PTSD and great regret that he could no longer serve his country as he once did. He didn’t know how to live anymore. He needed God’s help.

Receiving God’s personal care and love, then trusting His perfect sovereignty, enabled Krystal O’Neal to believe that her relationship status didn’t define her. It freed her from comparison and the shame that fueled it. She could then surrender to God in whatever He had for her in the future. She could then enjoy life as it came, because of her confidence in Christ.

Author and podcaster Krystal O’Neal came from a loving, healthy, and stable Christian home. With parents who modeled a Godly life and invested in her to help her develop her own personal relationship with Jesus, she had everything going for her. She assumed she would one day be married and living as a wife and mother. It has yet to happen. Shame followed. Questions arose. Was there something wrong with her? Had she failed in some way? As she believed God’s love, self-condemnation could free her.

We don’t always connect our negative behavior patterns and mindsets with the hurts of the past. We may believe those character defects are personality quirks or family traits. Instead, they are symptoms of the shame that fuels them. Naming them for what they are and then inviting God to bring healing to the hurt buried under the shame begins to bring healing. God wants to restore our souls.

Marilyn Johnson, speaker, ministry founder, and author, explains how God heals, as written in her book, Divine Revelation: The Ten Ways God Heals. She shares how prayer, healthy church relationships, wisdom, and other of God’s ways bring about the restoration of our lives after we have been harmed by sin. God’s hope is there for us as we learn to trust Him.

A lack of protection and relational tools left author, speaker, and ministry founder Marilyn Johnson naive and vulnerable. Pregnant at age 18 by a man in his 30’s left her isolated and afraid. The church looked down on her and her parents didn’t have the maturity to help her. God challenged her to walk with Him and she said yes. She experienced His love and grace, and she began to have deep intimacy with Him. She now shares the journey with others.

As Mags Ohmes grew relationally with trusted brothers and sisters in Christ, she began to heal from her shame. Through support groups and good friends, she learned that she was worthy of love and acceptance. Affirmation of her strengths and heart by good friends helped her to see herself accurately. Gratitude began to shift her focus from shame to grace.

Mags Ohmes has delightful memories from her early childhood, but when adulting skills needed to be taught, her parents couldn’t give her what they didn’t have. This resulted in dysfunctional relational dynamics for Mags that took her down a path of destruction. When she met Jesus, the healing began.

What a difference it makes when we know we aren’t alone in our experience. Executive Director of PAL (Parents of Addicted Loved Ones) organization, Kim Humphrey and his wife, Michelle, recount their journey of healing through the PAL groups. Even when their sons’ addictions remained active, Kim and Michelle found out they could be healthy. They learned more about the nature of addiction and how parental love looks different when a son or daughter lives with drug dependency. Coming out of isolation and into healthy relationship strengthened them to become the parents they needed to be for their sons.

Kim and Michelle Humphrey were imperfect but committed and loving parents. Kim, a police officer, and Michelle, a stay-at-home mom, taught their kids about the dangers of drugs. They invested in them as every good parent does. They were involved in church and loved Jesus. Yet in their teen and young adult years, both of their sons became addicted to drugs. People blamed them and distanced themselves from them. They felt so alone. Only when they connected with a PAL (Parents of Addicted Loved Ones) did they begin to have hope.

When Chuck Sedgwick, my husband, began building trust with men in the body of Christ, the narrative changed. Slowly he believed that he was worthy of healthy friendships. As he did life with trustworthy brothers in Christ, he grew in confidence and relational strength. The lie of his shame diminished, and God’s truth could be known.

Growing up with a father who was absent from the home for the majority of his childhood, Chuck Sedgwick, my husband, was left without a healthy model of what it means to be a man. Chuck shares the impact of this experience on his maturing process and how coming to know Christ as Savior opened up an avenue for healing and growth.

Author, teacher, and Christian life coach Tina Slaughter wanted freedom from a lifestyle of perfectionism and performance. She wanted intimacy with God. Through slow steps of choosing to spend time with God, that closeness grew. After a wilderness season, the nearness reached a new level, and she has learned to spend hours each early morning with God. In so doing, she found the purpose for her life, which she now shares with others.

Performance and perfectionism was a way of life for author, teacher, and Christian life coach Tina Slaughter. It was drilled into her as a child, and she needed it to gain the approval and belonging she sought. As a high achiever, she believed that perfection was attainable. Until life taught her that performance wouldn’t meet the needs of her heart. She needed God Himself to minister to her heart.

During the slow recovery process from living with an abusive husband who was a pastor, Terrie focused on survival. Yet God moved to restore her soul and reveal His true heart for her. Scripture, which was once distorted by her pastor husband, became life-giving to her. She learned that God cherished her and met her every need. Now she teaches others what God taught her, and it is changing lives.